Who Am I?

Hey Readers!

I hope you had an amazing long weekend (if you’re living in Canada) or just an awesome regular weekend if you’re living else where! I am so sorry we haven’t been posting regularly! I’m hoping this week we can get back on track and start bringing some great posts back! Today I wanted to check in a little and say where I’m at! If you follow the blog, then you know the struggle for me now is finding my place in the world. I’ve been feeling like my whole life is on hold, because I’m so confused about what I want to do! I was doing some job shadowing and did end up getting a couple jobs to figure out some sort of direction. I’ve felt like I haven’t been in a relationship with a guy for so long, because I’m worried about being tied down or changing myself to accommodate the guy more. I’m the type of person who will take the easy way out, and the easy way out is sometimes changing myself to suit the guys life instead of my own. This is the kind of person I am, I sometimes change myself for boys, friends, strong individuals, because I’m lacking so much confidence in my own life. I’m actually hindering myself by doing this, because I don’t get out and experience life and different things! I’m holding myself back and I didn’t think about this until today! So obvious, why couldn’t I see this before!

So, I went to Vancouver to find myself. My parents- the lovely people that they are- helped fund my trip to Vancouver, so that I could figure out what I wanted to do! While I was there, I hung out with my cousins who are in the film, theater industry- and I think I found myself. Thanks mom and dad!

I find that where I’m from, it’s very restrictive on what you can do. You either do nursing, engineering, health, teaching- jobs like that. People my age get married pretty early and are already having kids. This is totally fine- but not for me and not my life. I eventually want marriage and kids, but I’m caught up in finding myself, and to me this is more important. Those jobs don’t suit me or my lifestyle at all. They’re not what I want. So Vancouver was amazing. It was so different and unique and very much me! I job shadowed my cousin and helped make props for theater and opera shows- it was amazing. I’ve never done something that I’ve been so excited about it, I spent my entire days and hours working, not even knowing what time it was, and not caring because I was so lost in the work! Archaeology was probably the last time. So, I’ve decided I’m going to do that and archaeology. I’m super excited. However, I do think it’s important that I keep doing some soul searching, so I’m going to take this school year off, save for an epic Europe trip, save for school now, and keep putting myself out there!

If you’re also struggling, I recommend for you to do this too. Take a year off of school, get involved in the community in some way (I’m planning on taking art classes and pottery classes to get myself out there more), ask to job shadow- most people will say yes- or get a job similar to what you’re thinking about- maybe you’ll love it and maybe you’ll hate it!

Thanks for sticking around for the ride and helping to support me, it’s been amazing!

– Erin


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